Thursday, January 8, 2009

A Good Night's Sleep

So I have had alot of sleepless nights lately. Now that it is a certainty that I will be heading back to Campbellsville, I knew that things were going to change quickly. And I have loved being in Chatty. It seemed like the second I moved in I was already plugged in. And the more and more I got plugged in at Calvary, the more and more I fell in love with the church and the area. The youth there, and the way it is run, is amazing. I went to youth group one night, mainly to observe, and connected with two kids immediately, and have gotten pretty close with one of them. So the idea of moving now was not seen as a good thing.

And it's not that I think it's the wrong decision, because I know it's right. I know that you just don't end up somewhere. God divinely places people in certain areas, and He works everything out for the good of Him. But I realized why I hadn't slept much-my prayer life. I have been praying so much lately. But one of my greatest weaknesses is that I often times try to look eye-to-eye with God. Being a regular church goer for almost 9 years now, I know all the cute phrases. And I know stories, and some theology. So when I have been praying, it has almost been a formula. I know what to say, I know what the Bible says, I know what will please God. Except I didnt know what would please God, and it certainly wasn't my prayers. I was trying to put myself on level with God, by thinking that I knew everything that needed to be known. I failed to realize that the prayers that are powerful are the ones where we realize that God is the maker of the universe, and while we pray, that we are actually in His presence, on our face before Him. I was praying standing upright. Not physically, but in spirit.

So on Tuesday the guys came over for a little Bible study hang out time. Having a core group of guys has been huge for me since being down here. Nothing earth moving or mountain shaking was said, but that night, I prayed, truly prayed, and felt right to sleep. The first good night of sleep in over a week.

God can move people, and He doesn't need us to realize how big he is for it to be real. I am so small when it comes to a prayer life. I realize that praying before and after your Bible reading, or before meals, or bed, or Bible study doesn't mean you have an active prayer life. The active prayer life is constant. It's in the car. It's walking downtown. It's while watching tv. God is constant and always near, so a set schedule of prayer undermines the fact that He is there even when we don't realize it. It's when I fully realize this that my sleepless nights will end, and my burdens will really be laid before Him.

So there you go, a whole lot of rambling from a guy who needs to listen to his own words.

One last thought-8 pm. Fox. Find a good spot. Go Gators!!!

2 comments:

Alex said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Todd,

We are saddened to hear of your heading back to KY, but joyful knowing it is the Lord's will and that you will be able to go back to school and be...well, wherever He wants you to be. Forrest and I hope to spend some good time with you before you leave, and don't worry, we don't have kids yet :)
I don't believe for a minute that the Lord would forever after this year keep Chattanooga out of your sights. man, if anything, you have two homes and one day can return back to this one without worries of school and anything else.
we love you!
<>< falcon and falconess